The Silent Killer Whispers Loudly
The silent killer whispers loudly, but not everyone will hear it. Perinatal mood disorders are silent killers. In the year after giving birth too many families suffer in silence as postpartum anxiety, depression, P.T.S.D., and psychosis, talk, persuade, and even force them into the unimaginable. Not enough is being done about it.
It’s heartbreaking and terrifying.
A woman in her most vulnerable state, a new life, and a growing family; this time should be filled with joy and support, but it’s not. For many it is the darkest time in their lives. Our culture is accustomed to getting back to life as usual after birth and even in death. Being born and dying are completely normal parts of life; the beginning and the end, yet we don’t slow down nearly enough to honor either. Both childbirth and dying are taboo and not honored in our culture. Pair that with a lack of understanding, illness, and a failing healthcare system and the silent killer whispers loudly.
If you don’t think this is relevant to you, think again.
Don’t leave! You need to read this, feel this, and understand that it is affecting people you know and it’s not going away without a fight. Each one of us can make a difference!
An increasing number of people suffer during the postpartum period. It claims parents and families. The silent killer whispers loudly and isn’t prejudice, so whether it’s a first baby or tenth no one is exempt from the possibility of perinatal mood disorders.
Listen to those around you having babies, step in and step up! Ask how you can help and be ready to do what needs to be done!
Need some ideas? Here’s a few:
- feed older kids so she can get a shower
- handle bath or bedtime
- take the littles out for a walk so mom can nap when baby naps
- help tackle the laundry, dishes, or sweeping and mopping
- mow the grass
- take the trash cans down/bring them back up
- purchase postpartum support hours with apostpartum doula to help the family
If something feels off it probably is.
Maybe they desperately need help, but won’t ask because they’re afraid to hear, “no”! Offer to help! Whatever you do don’t avoid them, keep listening, keeping helping, keep encouraging them to speak to their doctor.
Please don’t shrug it off, tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone.
The silent killer whispers loudly, telling you that the world is a horrible place. It says stay in bed. The Silent Killer will hold you down as you try to get up. It sits heavily on your chest with hands over your mouth, whispering loudly into your soul that no one cares! It’s paralyzing!
Preinatal mood disorders hurts, physically!
It tells you not to shower or close your eyes or else your baby will stop breathing while you’re not standing watch. The silent killer tells you the devil is here on Earth and is coming for you. It tells you to run far from your home and hide so the devil doesn’t claim your family as it descends upon you.
Think this is crazy talk?! It is, and it’s real, this shit happens all the time!
The silent killer is a thief. It can make you drive atop of a bridge and shake you to the very core as you wonder where you are going, how you got there, and try to rationalize committing suicide. The Silent Killer whispers loudly, “You’ll never be good enough” and “they’re better off without you”.
It wants to rob you of your life and the lives of those around you!
The silent killer knows no concept of time. It won’t allow you to quiet the thoughts and drift off to sleep. It keeps you awake sometimes for days or weeks on end, it torments. In the darkest hours it calls out to you. It’s wearing you down and it needs only one thing. It needs you to feed its ego. It whispers loudly you can do it alone. The silent killer is a liar!
It wants you to believe it doesn’t exist, that everything is and will be fine. The Silent Killer wants others to believe that it can simply be prayed away! It wants you to believe others will think you’re crazy and will ignore your cries for help. These things don’t just happen in the movies, this is real life. It doesn’t only happens to single, white women, or to women who have lots of kids.
When faced with perinatal mood disorders you cannot go it alone! Please, please reach out to someone you trust if you have any feelings of uncertainty or thoughts of ending your life or the lives of anyone around you. Talk to your friends, if you aren’t sure who is friend or foe contact those who you were close with before you gave birth to your baby, no one matter what the silent killer tells you. Contact your family, your doctor, your pastor, your neighbor, your doula, anyone who will listen. Please do not suffer in silence.
Do not procrastinate; procrastination feeds the silent killer’s ego!